For Days When We Get It All Wrong

prayer for anger

God, there are days when I get this all so wrong. I lose my patience, I yell, I cry. I just don’t have the control I wish I had. Not over them, but over myself. I tell myself, “they’re just kids!” And then I battle with the patience I was never shown. I tell myself,…

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The Rising Fire Within Us

mother anger

It wasn’t only in the dark, when the lights were out and my thoughts had a tendency to expand and disparage themselves. It wasn’t only when the baby needed nursing at 2:00 a.m. and the street lights shone brightly across the street over our neighbor’s silver maple. It wasn’t only when I had to repeat…

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i sing it for you

I sing it for you

I roared at them tonight. And when I say roared, I mean bellowed from the very core of my being – the tired, angry, frustrated, exasperated, unheard and unnoticed depths of my body and soul, from which I was completely and utterly and maddeningly sick of having asked, cajoled, coaxed, pleaded, begged, demanded, and commanded them…

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spiritual practices with newborns: cleaning

Yellow-stained diapers are hanging outside on the deck, bleaching in the sun. Pump parts are drying on the kitchen counter. A rolled heap of wet mattress cover and crib sheet waits on the floor in front of the washing machine. Burp cloths are draped across couches and chairs. (And as I type this one-handed while…

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for the mornings we yell

For the mornings we wake up determined to make it a better day, and then we don’t – For the times we promise to soak up the sweetness of these fleeting years, and then we wish them away – For the days we want to fill with laughter and song, and then they’re darkened by bad…

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on bad moods and breaking bread

It started off as a lovely morning. Until. Isn’t that the way it always goes? Until the baby smeared yogurt all over his third outfit of the morning. Until the preschooler dawdled away all our free minutes pushing strawberries around his plate. Until one child cried for help getting shoes on the right feet while the…

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