When we were dating, then engaged, then married, I used to catch a glimpse of him and think—God, please send us daughters. Because I had never met a man like him, so strong and gentle all at once, so humble and quietly confident, so genuinely kind and caring. I watched how he treated his mother, his sister, his friends, and me. And I knew—with all the women who suffer father wounds, who never learn that they deserve to be treated with respect by every single man they meet—that we were meant to have daughters. That he would be so good to them. That he would leave such a legacy of love to build them up for a world driven to diminish their worth. Then God gave us a boy. And another. And another. Then we were going to have two girls—two!—but they went home to God as quickly as they were here. And then we had another boy. Now we are having another son. I realized I was wrong about raising daughters. Not that it wouldn’t have been amazing, … [Read more...] about another, again, anew
rainbow baby
my one and only gratitude post
A November full of thanksgiving. My Facebook feed is full of gratitude posts every morning and Twitter's a-twitter, too. Before the craze of Christmas consumerism kicks in, I'll take this cultural cultivation of "eucharist" any day. When we pause and whisper thanks. There are so many ways to say it, aren't there? Blessing, gift, grace, abundance. When I look back over the long arc of my life, I've known nothing but. Yet so many days were filled with complaining, griping, longing, lunging after more. Even now it starts to feel like this as my thoughts spin southward: if only I felt a little better, if only I weren't quite so sick, if only he were home more to help, if only I weren't so behind in work and writing, if only we could hire someone to clean the house, if only it were December already, if only I could trust that everything would turn out ok. Instead of the sheer gratitude of spilling out words that say yes. That say life. That say again. Because the gratitude of this … [Read more...] about my one and only gratitude post
