"One act of thanksgiving made when things go wrong is worth a thousand when things go well." (St. John of Avila) My children's favorite grace before meals is - (ducks and blushes from theological embarrassment) - the Johnny Appleseed song. Oh, the Lord's been good to me / And so I thank the Lord For giving me / The things I need The sun and the rain and the apple seed The Lord's been good to me Maybe you've heard it. Maybe you hate it. Maybe you, too, live with small children in the frigid north and have to substitute "snow" for "rain" six months out of the year. Whatever. We sing it. Every day. Lord, have mercy. It started when the kids were toddlers, and I figured any warbling hymn of thanks was music to God's ears. Over the years? Of course it stuck. (Anything you hope won't stick is invariably what does.) I try to limit it to lunchtime, so as to revel in a richer repertoire of church hymnody for other meals (because truly, one can only evoke Girl Scout campfire … [Read more...] about this is why we give thanks
gratitude
when you do not want to give thanks
It's been a hard month, hasn't it? In our small corner, it was the shock of twins. The exhaustion of early pregnancy. The darkness of morning sickness. And the upheaving of expectations. But in the wider world, it was Paris and Beirut and Syria and so many million more places where the earth is broken and blood is flowing and bullets are flying and despair is overwhelming. How do we live in a world like this? How do we go on, let alone hope? Every night before dinner our family takes turns around the table, asking each other what we want to thank God for. Sometimes I wonder if this facile practice is worth the effort. It's a harmless affirmation, I know. A chance to smile at the randomness of a preschooler's prayers or a toddler's grins. But my God. If we think about what it truly means to give thanks, it is a daunting and dangerous practice indeed. Because thanksgiving goes beyond any easy offering of what makes us happy in the moment. Thanksgiving looks straight … [Read more...] about when you do not want to give thanks
these are the waning days
Dear God, I cannot love thee the way I want to. You are the slim crescent of a moon that I see and my self is the earth's shadow that keeps me from seeing all the moon. - from the prayer journal of Flannery O'Connor Right now the days are waning. There is a thickness in the morning air, the cling of August humidity, beaded in droplets on the windows. The reluctant slide of late summer into early fall, the slow turn of seasons. The steady tick of each almost-school day on the calendar, edges furled by an almost-kindergartner equal parts itching to start and dragging his feet to stay in summer's ease. Each day we lose a little light. Browned grass crunches beneath our bare feet, and the tips of leaves start to curl under, steeling themselves against fall's first chill. These days are waning. Thomas' third birthday is tomorrow. When we carried staggering armfuls of moving boxes into this house, he was a barely crawling baby. Now when he chases his brother around the kitchen, he's … [Read more...] about these are the waning days
my one and only gratitude post
A November full of thanksgiving. My Facebook feed is full of gratitude posts every morning and Twitter's a-twitter, too. Before the craze of Christmas consumerism kicks in, I'll take this cultural cultivation of "eucharist" any day. When we pause and whisper thanks. There are so many ways to say it, aren't there? Blessing, gift, grace, abundance. When I look back over the long arc of my life, I've known nothing but. Yet so many days were filled with complaining, griping, longing, lunging after more. Even now it starts to feel like this as my thoughts spin southward: if only I felt a little better, if only I weren't quite so sick, if only he were home more to help, if only I weren't so behind in work and writing, if only we could hire someone to clean the house, if only it were December already, if only I could trust that everything would turn out ok. Instead of the sheer gratitude of spilling out words that say yes. That say life. That say again. Because the gratitude of this … [Read more...] about my one and only gratitude post
