This door marker greeted me on retreat last weekend. A small but important sign that I was in a place of hospitality, a hallmark of the Benedictines and their spirituality. Welcome. I thought about hospitality often while I was on retreat. When I saw the generous plates of snacks set out at every break. When one of the sisters helped me navigate their breviary books for evening prayer. When I noticed the basket of toiletries at the bathroom sink with a note to help yourself if you'd forgotten anything at home. Small gestures that convey a deeper embrace of the stranger as guest. . . . In his Rule for monastic orders, Saint Benedict writes that all guests who present themselves are to be welcomed as Christ. I remember seeing these words engraved in stone near the Abbey Church at Saint John's when I first started graduate studies at the School of Theology. During the next three years of studying and then five years of working within a Benedictine community, I've learned plenty about … [Read more...] about my mom, my mother-in-law, and…st. benedict?
grandmother
the women in my bones
I think about them a lot, my grandmothers. I never expected I would, at this point in my life. One died while I was in high school, the other while I was living abroad after college. My life today looks nothing like it did while they were alive, and as a teenager and young adult, I never thought to ask their advice on marriage or parenting or growing up. Yet their presence has become palpable since I became a mother. One had seven children, one had six. They raised their boisterous broods Catholic, kept beautiful homes, aged gracefully as matriarchs of their clans. My memories of them are thick with hugs, snuggled into sweaters and perfume, all warmth and smiles at the welcome of grandchildren. But the funny thing about grandmothers is that we never knew them when they were simply mothers. The messy part of parenting - the blood-sweat-tears of raising their own families through life's dreams and disappointments - is behind them by the time we enter the picture. The next generation … [Read more...] about the women in my bones
